Congratulations!! Finally you have made an entry in parenthood. You are loaded with overwhelming joy, excitement and fulfillment and will soon face some wonderful and unexpected changes in your life. The exhausting and tiring nine months of pregnancy seems worth when you hold your little one in your hand, when he cuddles in your arms, when he smiles at you and when you know that you both are like each other’s worlds.
However, there will be times when your emotions will be conflicted. The joy, happiness and excitement of having a baby will be smothered by the tiredness, exhaustion and 24/7 caretaking demands. At times, you will express anger towards your baby, but it will soon turn into guilt. You would not be able to do anything with routine as now your little helpless baby will set your daily routine. From your waking to eating, working, sleeping or any other activity, all will be governed by your baby activity.
Recall that Johnson and Johnson’s ad campaign in which they show that how having a baby changes everything i.e. feeling baby’s pain more than anything else, enjoying working with one hand and holding baby in other, understanding every clue of that little life. Bingo! The ad actually hits the truth. It’s a superb feeling to be a mother provided you accept the changes with a smile. Otherwise, having a baby can take its toll on you.
No doubt, changes are there but changes are always not bad. The first few months or a year may surprise you with the transformation, but soon the recognition and response to her make you feel connected and needed. You will learn to handle and adjust. However, before that you must know what all good or bad changes are expected after having a baby.
Knowing about changes might prepare you so that you do not scream on the dramatic changes in your life.
Social life after baby
After a baby, you are sure to join a huge club so called parenthood club which will have lots of mothers, their toddlers or new born enjoying long hours discussion on baby. Smiling at strangers with baby or adoring others’ children will be your new activity. Now, you will no more feel annoyed with other’s children nuisance instead will smile thinking about your own.
On the other hand, your social life which was before baby will be a far off idea. Outing with friends, watching movie with your partner, visiting at relatives’ place or attending any social gatherings will require you to think thousand times.
Major change in lifestyle after having baby
Now, you are no more that independent and free person planning your schedule on your will. You will now turn into a multitasking superwoman handling any type of work while baby in hand. Preparing food with one side occupied with baby and other moving a ladle, humming lullabies for your baby to make him sleep and working on laptop with another, picking things in one hand and holding baby in other, dancing to make him feed, managing in bathroom along with him, will be some common incidents in your day to day life.
Relationship with partner after a baby
No matter, how strong you were as a couple, even the strongest relationships are being tested while handling baby issues. Your relationship would officially be rocked for few initial months.
- Your husband may not know handling things well which may despise you every time when he changes the diapers, mixes the bottle, or feed the baby. You might watch your husband longingly and resent him while he leaves for work and you staying at home. May be sleep deprivation and hormonal changes are the reasons but you will surely face these issues.
- Your sex life will probably take a nosedive. Though, you are restricted for the same for initial six weeks but even if you get the go-ahead signal from the doctor, you still feel not ready. The stress, exhaustion, mood swings, lack of romance and breastfeeding whole night may be the other issues which hold you back.
- Frankly, at times, you will forget the existence of your partner. Your world revolves so much around your baby that you could not take out any time to give some care, love and time to your partner. Though, you love your baby than anything else but remember, it is your strong bonding as a couple which your baby needs the most.
- Now, there will be nothing like downtime when you can spend few hours sitting on the couch with partners’ arms around you and enjoying a romantic movie. The time you get besides your baby will now be consumed in cleaning up, prepping things for other day, household chores and others.
- Snapping, yelling or feeling hurt will be common occurrence. Calling out with lovely, sweet and pet names will be more difficult. The anger, frustration and inability of managing things will often leads to short fights between you.
However, despite all these ups and downs in your relationship, you both will share a new bond, the bond of being parents to a beautiful, innocent and lovely life. You both have a common reason to celebrate. No matter, how much your relationship is affected, but one thing is same, the emotions towards your baby which will bring both of you closer. The same baby who had created differences between you will bring smile, laughs and happiness on your faces.
Physical fitness after baby
Watching your baby weight increasing during pregnancy can be the most satisfactory thing. However, shedding of the same weight becomes the major challenge after pregnancy. Your breast size increases, which is often permanent. The tummy flab resists you from wearing desired attires. No admiration left while looking into mirror. On top of it, the lack of time which stops you in putting any efforts to attain pre-pregnancy weight adds to your worries.
Apart from this, chronic exhaustion, physical discomfort due to delivery, lack of sleep, 24/7 caretaking demands and body aches tumble down your excitation.
Emotional changes after a baby
Your thoughts are occupied by the feelings of anxiety, worry, joy, and pure love. You tirelessly try hard to become a good parent. You want to give the best care and protection to the baby along with right upbringing. Every second, every moment of your life has become all about her/his.
Your changed perspective towards the world makes you consider it dangerous and scarier for baby. Carelessness and ignorance has left your world as you have become cautious with every move of your baby. Now, you do not admire a rose closely just because baby is in your hands. Yet, you try to see the world with your child’s eyes for whom; it is a wonderful and amazing thing.
The feeling of being a mom will give you huge confidence. Nothing has changed, but still you will feel self-dependent, responsible, mature and a caring and loving person within you.
Your love and respect for your own parents would have increased manifold as you can very well understand the emotional turmoil they had faced.
Expecting to be a top-notch parent is everyone’s wish. Yet, sometimes we want a break from our baby but soon get clouded with guilt. Don’t blame yourself for this feeling as this is perfectly normal.
Change in behavior after baby
Patience has become more important now and you are accepting it. Unlike pre-pregnancy days, now you do everything how your baby wants you to do. You know moving somewhere means first feeding baby, packing her stuff, change her and then leave. Though, it takes lot more time but you have learnt adjustment. Now you can wait for your things as baby is on priority.
Alarm clocks in your home are of no use anymore as your child turns to be the best and perfect alarm for you. You have learnt getting out of bed on time and finishing your stuff in time.
By now, you may be falling for junk and street food to satisfy your culinary whims. However, now you will start respecting your body as this will be the greatest support for you when taking care of your child. Moreover, you know indulging in more healthy and nutritious food will inculcate the same habits in your child. Further, it will also boost your baby’s health as he/she is still feeding. You or your husband will now drop any unhealthy habits like drinking or smoking.
Now, you no more get irked with the lack of sleep. You will soon adjust even though; you are up most of the night.
While in public, you do not feel any hesitation or awkwardness making faces and talking in sign language with your innocent helpless child. Public comments and compliments least affect you now. In a way, you will be living your childhood again. You are just happy being with your baby anywhere, anytime and any day.
Bodily functions like poop, vomit will not make you repulsive anymore.
Financial worries
Earlier, when you wanted something, you had to have it by hook or crook. However, now you may need to prioritize things otherwise financial insecurities may trouble you. You yourself will be saving more to ensure the best upbringing for your child.
Professional compromises
One should make her mind to either leave job or to opt for a long maternity leave before having a baby. No matter, how important is your job; you will have to devote at least six months completely for your baby care. Even after that, you will be compromising on several things like dropping promotions as it brings more responsibilities, saying no to challenging projects, avoiding work in odd hours or denying some official parties while managing your work and home simultaneously. Some new moms fail to meet the challenge of handling these two big jobs together and end up quitting their job. This creates financial burden on their family as expenses have increased without any salary hike.
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